


Games with Remus

by DoomedKelpie



Series: Trick or Treat (And What Follows) [6]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Board Games, Card Games, Dark Creativity | Remus “The Duke” Sanders angst, Deceit | Janus Sanders Angst, Janus and Remus are friends, Light Angst, Remus being Remus, Sympathetic Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Sympathetic Deceit | Janus Sanders
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2020-12-19
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:34:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28134765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoomedKelpie/pseuds/DoomedKelpie
Summary: Janus has every right to play some board games with his friend.Even if he fears the others’ possible reactions.
Series: Trick or Treat (And What Follows) [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2002450
Comments: 8
Kudos: 101





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, this takes place almost right after ‘Gloves’, but it isn’t focused on what happened in that one.
> 
> And in this part, Remus is finally going to actually be there instead of just, like, mentioned. *yay*

Janus and Remus were playing a board game in the Light Sides’ common room. Which was fine. Remus was his friend, and he could play board games with his friend just like anyone else. Besides, considering recent events, he was stressed, and it was just good self care to partake in relaxing activities. Like spending time with a friend. He  _ certainly _ wasn’t worried about what the other sides would think when they noticed Remus was there. No, he wasn’t concerned  _ at all _ that Patton had already noticed when he came to greet Janus, nor was he concerned about how often Patton was sticking his head into the room to check on them. Janus wasn’t worried the  _ slightest _ bit that Roman would freak out if he found his impulsive brother hanging out on this side of the mindscape. Or that Logan would be annoyed with him. Or that Virgil would be afraid or angry.

No, he was  _ definitely _ as care-free as ever. 

And there was  _ no way _ he was hoping that the others would start to accept Remus too, even if Thomas didn’t yet. He didn’t think that maybe,  _ just maybe _ , seeing Remus do something normal, and do it relatively calmly, would help them see that Remus was just another side, and that he wasn’t as bad as they thought he was. 

Because Remus wasn’t really  _ bad _ at all. He came up with gross ideas,  _ disturbing _ ideas, and sometimes he got carried away with them, but he didn’t ever (... Usually.) really mean to hurt anyone. Even knocking out Roman during his first appearance in front of Thomas was a bit of poorly-thought-through theatrics, and Remus  _ did _ feel bad about it later, after he realized that Roman wasn’t just playing along. Because Remus’s problem wasn’t that he was evil- it was that, with as many thoughts as he had, he didn’t always know the difference between a thought that  _ should _ be carried out and one that  _ shouldn’t _ . But still, all of his most horrifying antics were illusions. Of  _ course _ they were illusions. They were imaginary, after all, so pretty much anything they did was an illusion.

Regardless, Remus  _ was _ an aspect of Thomas’s personality, no matter how much Thomas didn’t want to face that part of himself. And maybe Thomas could get away with ignoring half of his creativity when he was younger, but Thomas was an adult now. He can and, perhaps,  _ should _ have more mature thoughts, more mature ideas. And it wasn’t as though Thomas never used any of Remus’s ideas. He just wasn’t ever aware of it, just as he wasn’t aware of Janus’s influence before he revealed himself. Remus had useful contributions; they just weren’t listened to if their source was known.

“Hey, did you know that you have the word ‘anus’ in your name, J-anus?”

Which wasn’t to say that everything Remus came up with was a good idea, or that Thomas should carry out most of Remus’s suggestions. Hell, even Remus, once the moment was over, would probably be horrified if Thomas actually did half of what he told him to. It was just fact that Remus, in addition to being part of creativity, embodied intrusive thoughts. That didn’t negate his actual contributions, just like everyone else’s flaws didn’t negate theirs. 

“Only because you tell me that every time we have a chat.”

Okay, really, Remus wasn’t acting as intrusive thoughts  _ most _ of the time. If he was, Thomas would certainly experience intrusive thoughts a hell of a lot more. No, his thoughts were dark and often morbid, but the vast majority of them were harmless.

And so, he and Janus were sitting in the living room playing a board game because they had every right to. And just maybe, recent events had shown Janus that the others wouldn’t go back to hating him over any little thing he did. And maybe that gave him hope that they could extend that sentiment to Remus too, at least eventually.

He just had to show them that Remus wasn’t a villain or a monster either. 

“Oh. Well you do! You have a  _ BUTT _ in you!”

They had been playing for a while before any other side besides Patton showed up. Logan came into the room with a book in his hand before stopping short at the sight of the two of them sitting at the coffee table. The momentary surprise, however, quickly faded back into the apathy Logan used when interacting with Remus.

“Oh. Hello, Janus. Remus,” Logan greeted, his voice level. “I was going to read a book. Are you… playing CandyLand?”

Remus looked up from the game with a wide grin that, though it appeared scary, was really just a sign that Remus was enjoying himself.

“Yup! Wanna join?” Remus asked. “I’d  _ totally _ be down for a threesome.”

Ah. Well. Remus was Remus, after all. Even if he wasn’t as scary as they thought, he still had his own particular sense of humor.

“I-er. No,” Logan stumbled slightly. “I’m fine with my book.”

“Your loss,” Remus said with a shrug before picking up another card. “Ooooh, red. Like blood.”

And so, Logan settled onto the couch, book in hand and reading slightly slower than he usually would. Janus pretended he didn’t notice the way he glanced up from the book every time he flipped the page. 

Virgil was the next one to come into the room. He was looking for Patton and noticed there were people sitting in the living room. Janus saw his shoulders tense up, but they lowered with a few deep breaths. 

“Hey,” Virgil greeted. “What are you guys up to?”

“CANDYLAND!”

“Hm. Well, I’m going to help Patton in the kitchen,” Virgil told them.

Before he turned around to leave, he met Janus’s eyes, giving him a small, brief smile. Janus froze for just the slightest moment, and then a bit of relief flowed through him. Okay, Virgil, at least, was more-or-less fine with Remus being here. Janus hadn’t really been sure because, though Virgil had been friends with Remus before, that didn’t necessarily indicate what his feelings were now (and he saw the Dealing with Intrusive Thoughts video- Virgil hadn’t seemed very happy to see Remus then). Janus of all sides knew that. And even though they were friends, Remus did still scare Virgil during his more unpredictable moments. But it was fine. Virgil hadn’t freaked out or gotten angry. He just smiled and accepted it. Maybe he could tell that Janus was anxious about what they thought and wanted to reassure him. Everything was fine. He and Remus just had to keep playing.

But Roman was the last one to show up, and he didn’t do so until it was just about time for dinner. By then, the two of them had switched to playing cards, and Remus was starting to get more jittery.

“Hello, everyone!” Roman called as he waltzed into the room.

And then he stopped. 

“...Why is my brother here?”

“HI, ROMAN!” Remus greeted instead of answering. “You wanna see me fold this card into a throwing star?”

“Wh-!”

“Remus, if you do that, we  _ will  _ definitely be able to continue playing,” Janus spoke quickly.

“Oh. Yeah,” Remus agreed, twirling his mustache. “But I could just make a new card to replace the one I use for origami!”

“H-”

“Don’t you have enough origami throwing stars?” Janus asked, continuing to deflect the conversation. “Maybe try something else this time?”

He didn’t want to start another fight. Maybe if he just kept pretending this was normal, Roman would give up on questioning it.

“Like what?”

“A dragon maybe?” Janus suggested. “Regardless, it  _ wouldn’t _ be easier to just use origami paper.”

“Aaaah, but dragons are so  _ boring!” _

“How is a fire-breathing beast  _ boring? _ ”

“Sto-”

“Ooooh, I bet I could make it  _ actually _ breathe fire!”

“Yes, because making a flammable object breathe fire is a  _ great _ idea.”

“See! I  _ knew _ you’d get it!”

Janus was about to respond, but he got cut off before he could start by Roman.

“Would you stop ignoring me?!” he shouted. “ _ Why _ is Remus here?!”

And with that, Janus’s fears spiked back up. He knew this would happen. He knew Roman would get angry. 

“Oh, you mean little old  _ me _ ?”

“Of course I mean you, you fiend! Do I have another brother?!”

Oh, this was a mistake. He shouldn’t have done this. He should have just played with Remus in his room. Maybe he was wrong in thinking that recent events would help them accept Remus too. Maybe this was just going to make Roman go back to hating him again.

“He and Janus are just hanging out,” said Virgil.

When did Virgil come out of the kitchen? 

“But  _ why _ is he  _ here _ ?” 

“They’re just playing a game, Roman.”

“ _ Now _ , maybe, but Remus-”

“Remus has been fine this entire time!” Janus blurted out suddenly. “We’ve been playing for over two hours, and he hasn’t broken anything or hurt anyone!”

And now Roman’s attention was on him. Crap. Even if Roman wasn’t mad before, he sure would be  _ now _ . 

“Yeah! I haven’t done anything! Yet.”

“See! He-”

“Roman, why don’t you see if Patton needs help setting the table?” Logan requested with a sigh, obviously trying to avoid an argument as well.

“But-!”

“Roman,” Virgil hissed quietly. “Not now.”

He looked like he wanted to keep arguing, but instead, he just sputtered and sighed before spinning around to go into the kitchen. Virgil gave Janus another look and followed him. It only took a minute before he could hear hushed arguing from the other room, making Janus’s skin crawl. He suddenly wished he was alone so he could take off his gloves.

“Hmph! That  _ butthole! _ ” Remus huffed. “And here I am, being  _ perfectly _ polite!”

The other man crossed his arms, appearing angry for a moment. But then he shifted and picked up his cards again.

“Anyway, you have any fives, Dee?”

“Oh. Uh. No,” Deceit responded, handing Remus a card.

“Nice!”


	2. Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so, they mostly just hint at it, but this chapter does deal with what happened in ‘Gloves’ a bit more than the last chapter. So, if you didn’t read that part, the conversation in this chapter probably won’t make much sense. 
> 
> If you don’t want to read the last part, though, the gist of it is that Janus picks his skin and the others find out about it. 
> 
> Also, not to keep venting in my author’s notes, but I’m like?? Really mad?? Sometimes, I’m unable to talk, which is something I’m working on with my therapist, but in my last session, instead of waiting for me to be able to speak, she turned off her camera? And then she sent me a message saying that it seemed like I didn’t feel like doing our session today, so she was going to do paperwork and I should say something if I ‘change my mind’. So, I ended up being unable to speak and barely able to move for the entire hour (even though I was trying to really hard), and once our time was over, she just, like, ended the zoom without even saying goodbye?? And like, she knows I’m having a really hard time right now and that I literally CAN’T talk sometimes. So I’m just. Mad.   
> (Sorry, update no one asked for: my parents talked to her and changed their mind, so I still have to keep going to this therapist ‘Cuz reasons)  
> 
> 
> Anyway, back to your semi-regularly-scheduled programming:

Dinner had been tense, though Janus supposed it could have gone a lot worse. Roman was snippy the entire time, seemingly only seconds from fighting Remus at any given moment. Patton and Virgil tried to keep the peace in their own ways, though Patton was too disturbed by most of what Remus said to even try to defend him, and even Virgil reached his limit with the other side eventually. He was surprised to find that Logan seemed to tolerate Remus’s dark thoughts the best other than himself. The logical side remained mostly unperturbed and would simply correct factually incorrect information as it came up, without trying to stop Remus from actually talking. 

That was something, at least.

Nonetheless, Remus had to leave after dinner to go take care of something on his side of the imagination (probably a monster he wanted to fight), and he saw the way the other sides relaxed almost immediately after Remus left. The sight made him uncomfortable, both because he felt bad for Remus and because he couldn’t help but wonder if the others would relax even more when he left as well. 

And at that thought, Janus decided that he should probably leave as soon as he could. He was helping Patton with the dishes, though, so he would leave right after. He was glad that Patton had put him on drying duty because, as much as his gloves looked like the ones for washing dishes, they very much  _ were not _ , and he didn’t want to have to take them off. 

But that left him and Patton in awkward silence that he certainly wasn’t willing to break at the moment. And, surprisingly enough, it seemed like Patton wasn’t willing to, either. 

So, once the dishes were all clean and put away, Janus bade Patton goodnight and went to leave. He, however, found himself stopped by Virgil, who he hadn’t even noticed was still in the kitchen.

“Hey, uh, I was wondering if we could talk real quick?” he asked.

“...  _ Definitely not _ ,” Janus replied, sighing as he led Virgil down the hall to his room.

Janus had a feeling that this was a conversation he’d rather have privately. He was suddenly sure that Virgil was going to scold him for inviting Remus. Sure, he’d been fine with Remus just being in the living room to play games, but maybe inviting him to dinner was too far? It was, admittedly, hard to eat around the man sometimes, though he was used to it by now. And it wasn’t like he’d even really  _ asked _ \- it just didn’t seem right to send Remus off to eat alone when he was  _ right there _ . Plus, Virgil had started getting annoyed eventually, and maybe he regretted letting Janus’s attempt at including Remus slide. 

It was when they reached Janus’s door that Virgil started speaking.

“Dude, I don’t know why you’re freaking out, but I’m not, like, mad or anything,” Virgil reassured him. “This isn’t about Remus. Or, well, I  _ do  _ kinda want to talk about that, but I wanted to talk to you before I even knew he was around. Okay?”

Janus just shrugged and opened his door, gesturing for Virgil to enter.

“What  _ didn’t _ you want to talk about then?” Janus asked as he closed the door behind himself.

“Just, well…,” Virgil stumbled, rubbing the back of his neck. “I wanted to check in with how you’re doing? And, uh… I kinda wanted to apologize?”

“... For what?”

Virgil shuffled his feet awkwardly.

“I was just… reminded when you were helping Pat with the dishes… about the comment I made… about your gloves…,” Virgil explained, sighing. “Look, I didn’t know why you wore them when I said that, and I’m sorry.”

“Oh, that,” Janus replied, acting like it wasn’t of any importance. “It’s fine; it didn’t bother me.”

Virgil raised an eyebrow at him. Ah. He knew was lying.

“Alright, fine,” he sighed. “It bothered me a bit, but I knew you didn’t know about it. And really, I can handle a joke about my clothing. Plus, I insulted you right back.”

“Okay,” Virgil accepted, knowing he was forgiven. “But how are you doing? I know it’s been a few days since, you know…”

Janus crossed his arms over his chest.

“Not much different than before,” Janus responded. “Logan wants to start teaching me coping methods tomorrow, and I’m sure  _ that _ will be  _ splendid _ .”

“Yeah, it probably won’t be fun…,” Virgil agreed. “But I think it’ll help in the end.”

He sighed.

“We’ll see. Stopping  _ certainly _ worked out the last time I tried it.”

“Well, maybe it  _ won’t  _ work. But maybe it will,” Virgil countered. “Best to keep an open mind.”

“I  _ suppose _ …”

And with that, the two of them paused before Virgil continued.

“So, I’m really not here because of it, but do you mind talking about Remus?” asked the other side. “You seemed really nervous earlier.”

“Can’t I just play some games with a friend?” Janus retorted huffily.

Of course, part of him knew that Virgil wasn’t angry about Remus- that he had reassured him already earlier, albeit silently. But another part of him still worried that he  _ was _ angry with him, that Virgil had changed his mind. And that part of him made him want to hiss in defense.

But Virgil remained calm.

“Yeah. You can,” he told him. “That’s my point. But I know that the others weren’t too happy about it, especially Roman.”

“...”

“I’m saying you don’t have to worry about it. Logan and Patton are trying, at least. Though you of all sides know that Remus can be difficult sometimes,” Virgil continued. “But they won’t be mad at you for it or hate you or anything else you’ve come up with in that head of yours. Overthinking is  _ my _ job, okay? If you want to hang out with Remus, hang out with Remus. Gaining new friends doesn’t mean you have to lose old ones.”

Janus couldn’t help the hurt expression that crossed his face for a moment. Virgil’s words were meant to be comforting, but he’d accidentally stumbled onto the land mine that was the past- when they fought, and Virgil left, and Virgil  _ most definitely _ stopped being his friend in favor of his new ones. But Janus couldn’t really blame him.

“Shit- that’s…,” Virgil cursed, seeing the expression on his face. “Jan, we’ve been over this. I was mad, you were mad, and things were a mess. But we’re still friends, okay? Sometimes friends fight and say stupid shit and kinda stop being friends for a while I guess? And, ugh, I’m bad at this.”

Virgil covered his face, eventually moving his hands back to comb through his own hair.

“I understand, Virgil,” Janus cut him off before he could go down a spiral of thoughts. 

“Look, I didn’t…,” Virgil huffed. “Fuck, I come here to see how you’re doing and apologize, and I end up upsetting you. Great.”

Janus put his hands on Virgil’s shoulders.

“It’s  _ not _ fine, Virgil,” he lied. “I really  _ don’t _ get it. It  _ wasn’t _ like we fought all the time or anything…”

Janus took a deep breath in.

“Virgil, I don’t blame you for leaving, not anymore,” he switched to the truth, looking into Virgil’s eyes. “And that’s the truth. I… didn’t like the fighting, either… Nor did Remus, I think…”

At that, Virgil shuffled again and shoved his hands into the pocket of his hoodie.

“How’s Remus doing, anyway?” Virgil asked, changing the topic.

“Same as ever, as far as I know,” Janus replied. “Though, I’ve been a bit… more  _ distant _ lately, I suppose.”

“You mean you’ve been staying in your room all the time,” Virgil snorted. “You know, moping in your room is  _ also _ my thing.”

“Oh,  _ please _ ,” Janus returned, cracking a smile. “I’ll have you know I was the hermit  _ long _ before you were.”

Virgil lightly punched his shoulder.

“Christ, dude, you’re really taking over my emo thing here,” Virgil joked before his expression became serious again. “So, are we good? For now, at least?”

Janus nodded.

“Cool. So, do you wanna watch a movie or something?”

“ _ Absolutely not _ .”


End file.
